Wednesday, September 22, 2010

✖aku cuba untuk menafikannya✖

0 cinta utkku
aku cuba untuk tidak terlalu mengharap..
aku cuba untuk melupakan nya..
hati marah atau sedih atau kecewa..
pasti senang untuk menafikan nya dan melupakan nya..

tapi..bila hati ini menginginkannya...
adakah akn dapat??
pasti tidak bukan...

aku cuba untuk tabah kan diri aku..
aku cuba menahan air mata ini dari menitis...
tapi...
makin aku tabah..
makin tinggi ego aku sebagai seorang wanita...
makin aku menahan air mata untuk gugur ke pipi..
makin laju ia menitik...

aku cuba endah kn ape yang berlaku depan mata aku..
tapi..
makin aku endah kn...
makin kuat aku ingin amik tahu...

damn!!damn!!

knp la begitu sukar untuk aku menafikan hati ini??
jiwa ini??
knp la hati aku begitu lembut???

aku kecewa dgn diri aku yang tidak pernah sesekali tabah...
yang hanya tahu ego,degil dan keras hati...
yang sentiasa berlagak seperti mengerti ape yang dilakukan...
dan berlagak tanpa perlu meminta bantuan sesiapa...
berlagak pndai padahal bodoh...

aku cuba jauh kan diri..
tapi apekan daya..
makin aku menjauh kn diri dr die..
mkin hampir hati ku pd die...

aku xleh mengalah..
aku akn terus kan jua perjuangan ini...

demi elak dari terluka..
atau...
akan terlebh terluka..

nota: meneruskan sandiwara ini @ tidak??

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Monday, September 20, 2010

✖sorry broken your heart because of me✖

0 cinta utkku
i never though that i will broke your heart again..
its all my fault..
i try to being me..
but
every times i try to be me...
it will hurt your feeling...
and thats why i'm afraid to being me..
i'm afraid of my shadow..
and i'm afraid to fall in love again..
cause i'm afraid that i will hurt someday..

its hard to care about me..
cause everytime you try to near by me..
on the same time your heart is hurt..
true right??
i want to say sorry..
but i know your heart still hurt no matters what...
i try to be honest..
but its still the same damn thing..
and it make it worst...

i always love you...
yess i do..
your love always in my heart..
if you can heard me..
please call me back..
please be my side...
and i keep calling your name on deep in my heart...
i know nobody can heard it..
but i can...

you always asked me to being me..
me myself...
but..
when i be myself..
you keep on silent...
silent until i want to crying..
your silent make me crazy..
yes..i'll crazy because of you...

i think...
its time for me to run away from you...
to keep your heart from keep hurting...
to make your smile come back..
to make your life become more happier...

well my love...
i'll keep the love with me..
but remember me..
i'll always waiting you..
don't want to marry you its doesn't meaning that i don't love you..
i always love you..
please trust me..
i know its hard to you..
its also hard to myself too..
i always love you deep in my heart...
always...

i'll marry with you someday..
hope lets we pray together that we are mean to be together forever...

p/s: i love you always even you make me cry...

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Thursday, September 16, 2010

✖honest is hard, liar is easy✖

0 cinta utkku
its that true that honest is hardest thing??
for me,honest is not hard is you know how to be honest and not try to be too way honest to somebody,...

liar..lie to other person is bad thing..it can be worst nightmare if the person know the truth..
for me, sometimes we need to be liar just cause to care about someone else feeling...

I try to be honest..I always want to be honest..its does not mean I'm a liar...I just keeping the secret save in my heart..not easy keep about my feeling away from everybody..

keeping secret about feeling can make an emotional..if the emotional control our heart and mind..it hard to make an decision..it just like satan is whispering in ears and try to illuminate our heart..it can make our mind and heart lost...and the satan will proud of itself cause seditious our mind...

seems like my english is worst.. (sape suh ponteng klas inggeris.)..

back to the title..
being a liar...if always a liar even a good thing still want to cheating other person..they must know the due that will happen..it maybe the worst thing ever...

honest....i like being honest..but i like keeping secret to..i mean if i had a problem..i will secret it..thats why i always crying alone..alone in my bed..hahaha...crying until my eye swelling..

owhh!!i sound stupid speak english..hahahaha~speak malay la..

jujur memang sukar...penipu memang senang..tapi..jujur akan mendatang kn kebaikan..tp menipu mendatang kan akibat yg sgt2 teruk...

menipu biarlah ada sebab nya,...dan jujur lah bertempat..kalau leh..lapik2 lah kejujuran yang ada..

mlm...
mate bengkak...
ngantok~

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Sunday, September 5, 2010

✖mara tapi rindu✖

0 cinta utkku
aku marah memang mara...tp aku jua rindukan die...aku xnk menjadi seorg yg pendendam...tuh bukan aku...even dlu aku seorg yang pendendam...tp skrg da x...hihihi...

miss him it just like missing moon at nite...dark and empty...nothing at the sky only hope that moon and star keeping shinning...bringing bright at nite...

love him??I dun think so...I just feeling empty..i hate him...but keep missing him...what thats mean??mean love???i hate love male...what for???bkn muhrim pon...i rather egois than i admit that i like him....even...i want to fall in love with my hubby-wanna-be..ahhah~~fairytales again n again...seems like never be come true...but maybe will come true..hahhhahah~~just be patient..

mad at him...who like to be cheated??hahahha~it fool if i say i like..pretending n be drama Q is not me...i hate it..but i like secret it..n talkativeness when i'm mad him..hahaha..silent is nice kn..

he miss me??in my dream!!!FYI,i'm nothing in his life...but y i keeping thinking of him???y??i try to think something else..but the thing i thinking keep goes round n round n then back to him...huhuhu~~hate it...dislike to admit it...never n ever...

i want to call him..but i'm afraid that his buzy with his sister..shopping...or he driving back home..o his sleeping...(cm la x pnh kaco org tido..)..hahahahha~~terjwb suda...hahaaha...hari da mlm...better aku sleep..tp aku rse kn..aku xleh nk tido!!aahahah~

hate it...forever!!!

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤

Saturday, September 4, 2010

✖bila aku kecewa✖

0 cinta utkku
assalamualakum....
hari nih aku buka puasa kt KL..kt tasek KLCC...dkt dgn msjid..pas buka kmi g solat magrib la..hihihi...simple je kn..then kmi jln2 dlm mall KLCC..best...

but that not the thing that I try to say...the thing is...my feeling...xtau dgn sape aku nk luah kn

aku taw aku xde hak nk halang ape yg org tuh wat..siyes..asal kn ia x slh undg2 negara dan ikut islam kite...tp..it for his own good health..

aku xleh nk blame die 100%..coz aku memg xgtau die ape mslh yg aku hadapi..bkn ape..kes lalu still hantui aku..mls nk amik taw psl org la...tah la..mls da...

ditipu..mati2 aku ingt die da benti dr benda tuh..tp sangkaan aku meleset...xde pon..still cm die blm knal aku still..still cm kmi blm jd kwn..sedey taw..aku thn air mate aku kuar dr depan die..aku cubit kuat2 bntl yg ada dlm kete..aku gengam tgn aku..aku hope aku tabah hadapi sume nih..

kecewa taw..kecewa sgt2...aku xnk nges coz org bkn famili aku..aku hnye menangis krn famili je..xlebeh...

Ya Allah...tlg la berikan aku jodoh yg aku ingin kn..andai die tidak sempurna fizikal..asal kn die hormat kehendak aku..die akn bawa aku ke syurga..andai die jodoh aku..aku nk sehidup dan semati dgn die..bia kli ini syurga menjadi saksi percintaan kmi setelah kami sah menjadi suami isteri di bumi...aku xmoo die tgglkn aku dahulu dan mati krn penyakit...kalo leh,bia la mati kerana ajal die sudah smpai...berikan la lelaki yg aku mahukan dr dulu...tlg la..aku da x thn lg da...jauh kn la aku dr lelaki yg bkn jodoh aku..aku da serik da...Aminn....

memg susah kn kalo da kecewa...aku xtaw nk citer kt sape lg da...aku selalu slh kn dri aku ble aku x dpt mara kn org len...aku pendam dan aku nges krn aku xmmpu nk mara kn org...slh ke aku wat cmtuh???aku xtaw knp aku ske pendam perasaan aku...aku ske sendirian..so ble aku moody kalo leh aku nk sorg2 je perap...aku xtaw dgn sapa ptt dgr luahn ht aku...aku juz nk some1 yg juz dgr ape aku nk ckp..dgr je..jgn smpok..jgn..

byk kli da isu ini timbul...trse cm ditipu idup2...tp sape aku dlm idup die..aku sndri xde hak...die x pnh gtau aku kes nih..aku ingt kn kes nih da setel...die da oke...tp...aku benci org cmtuh..aku xske bnda2 tuh..tp die amik bnda tuh...siyes..aku try thn tp aku xmmpu da..aku x larat lg da simpan...aku xnk nmpk lgsg bnda tuh..xnk lgsg...

aku try thn air mte aku..tp last kuar gak..ape leh buat,,aku perempuan yg sensitiv...lemah..dpn sume org aku tnjuk tabah..tp blakang org len..aku lemah sgt2...maap..aku da x mampu..dan aku nk serah kalah je...terus kn la dgn idup ko..dan aku dgn idop aku...

punah da semua...skrg hnye tggl kenangan....hihihihi....

jodoh ku ada di luar tuh..aku sedia menunggu...sementare tggu kamoo..aku nk jasa dgn ibu bapa aku dlu..hihihi....

tah ape aku merepek..tp aku sorg je yg paham

❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
Usagi Sailor Moon - Link Select